Negative Emotions: Don’t let them get to you !
I want to share a simple technique with you on how to deal with some emotions you rather wish you did not have. The technique is called “witness”.
Instead of feeling the full impact of your emotions, become your own witness for one day and observe your actions as if you stood next to your real self watching what’s going on. Imagine you could see yourself as you have breakfast, walk out of the house, get in the car, drive to …whereever. “Move” your consciousness up by one level and just notice what you see, including the emotions you see this person (you !) having. If you get angry, let the witness in you notice this anger.
By removing yourself from the direct impact and choosing to experience your emotions from the perspective of the witness you gain 3 big advantages:
Not only will you see the situation with a wider angle, seeing a bigger picture…you will also notice that those strong emotions simply won’t feel anywhere near as strong as they used to and most importantly: you will gain some vital seconds before you react, some vital seconds to CHOOSE ! how you react. This gives you power and puts you in the driver’s seat.
NLP has known this technique for decades and calls it dissociation (if your life was a picture, you would see yourself in it) as opposed to association (seeing your life out of your own eyes). Feelings are being experienced more strongly when associated and less strongly when dissociated. As a result, NLP recommends dissociation for negative emotions and of course association for positive emotions (you don’t want to just be a witness when you have the best time of your life 
! )
Try being a witness today ! What is different and how does it make things better for you ?
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January 4th, 2009 at 11:20 am
Negative emotions are kill a person’s spirit and almost leading them to commit a social suicide. It was a very useful article.