“It’s not about me !” or Taking Things Personal
Have you ever suffered from or felt hurt about comments which others, such as colleagues, family members or friends have passed about you ? Today I share a powerful secret with you ! None of these comments were actually about YOU ! Yes, I mean what I say. Here is why.
Most people are way to pre-occupied with themselves to truly be interested in you. Everything they say and all their behaviour is only an expression of what is going on in them, what is on their mind and needs an expression. So when these people say something about you or behave in an unpleasant manner vis a vis yourself, what they are actually doing is giving away information about themselves. If they judge you e.g. by calling you lazy, you get to know that laziness is something that bugs them, probably about themselves. If they try and push you aside at work, you get to know that they might be afraid of you, that they might feel insecure and worry they might not succeed otherwise. If someone snaps at you without much of a reason, you get to know that they might be very stressed or have been snapped at themselves….maybe by their partner….
Once you realize that other people’s comments or behaviour are nothing personal but simply information about them, then you can relax. You can even become curious and maybe even feel sorry for their situation or behaviour. The main thing: you are free.
So next time you feel the rising anger or hurt because of someone else’s comments, tell yourself “It’s not about me !” and become curious instead “I wonder what is going on with that person ?”
Try this for the entire next week and see what difference it makes !
Your Perfect Summer Holiday in the Bavarian Alps
Entries RSS